Can You Imagine Having your “Lifelong Dream” of having your natural born children, “Taken away from you”? Leaving you hopeless, and empty? Can You Imagine Being wheeled in on gurney into surgery, at 36 and Not Knowing “if you would make it out alive”? Not knowing if the cancer spread”?
There was a cold chill running down my spine as I lay on a hard gurney, surrounded by white walls. A bright light was shining down over me, as I was surrounded by a doctor, nurses, anaesthesiologist, and medical staff.
“Now close your eyes” “Go to a Happy Place” and we will see you when you wake up, the doctor or was it a nurse who said the reassuring words. I was awakened to the bright lights and the bright smiles of nurses. Voices saying, “Your Surgery went well” and “It’s all done”
I thought a million thoughts, one of them was “Did they take out all the cancer”? I thought “Just Breathe” Inhale, Exhale. The air coming into my lungs was so refreshing, and as I let air out it was a relief.
With each breath, I was able to cleanse my worries, my fear and anxiety related to the thoughts of the cancer, that might still be inside me. So, with each breath, it was like the oceans wave coming in to the tide, and with each exhale it was going away from the tide back out into the ocean crashing against into waves.
How was Hula Warrior Goddess born?
It was a rainy cold day outside, November 2006 when I was at work inside my office on the 7th floor in the Executive Suite. I received a phone call from the OBGYN , the familiar reassuring voice said “Cheryle” “I would like you and your husband to come in to my office for an appointment this week.” The voice went on to say words like endometrial and hyperplasia w atypia. I accepted the request and made plans to go into my office.
You could hear a pin drop in the doctor’s office. I sat on the cold bed, where the two metal leg holders for your usual pap smear laid folded against the bed. My heart was in my stomach, since I had been trying to get pregnant in 2006, and this visit was the result of a pap smear that was done a few months earlier. My husband sat on the chair with widened eyes. Dr Shaw walked in with a warm reassuring look and partial smile on her face, but mostly firm. This was a different facial feature, as it was more serious than usual.